Mommy Needs Vodka: 15 Things in Your Purse that No One Else (Probably) Has in Theirs

15 Things in Your Purse that No One Else (Probably) Has in Theirs

What's in Your purse?


Mommy Needs Vodka with Macgyvering Mom

Before I had kids, I always used a cute Coach bag to carry everything I needed. I actually have three Coach's hanging in my closet, two of which have been there for ten years now. After I had the twins, naturally came the switch to a diaper bag.

Problem is, the kids are out of diapers now, but instead of going back to Coach, I've not been able to downgrade from a large tote!  Recently I overheard my son say, "My mom's got everything in there!" So it prompted me to look, and sure enough, I found everything from a plastic dinosaur to a spork from Taco Bell to the torso of a Lego minifig.

It prompted me to ask the followers of my Facebook page to ask what they have in their purses. Naturally, they did NOT disappoint....everything from a flask of bourbon to a pencil with a decapitated emo doll head on the eraser are in these bags!

Here were some of the most popular responses (names used with permission):



1. Crown Royal bag with Darts

Krickett Crawford wrote, "My purse itself is a crown royal bag...but my unusual items include a pen that looks like a bone, dart flights, pool chalk, rose quartz and the blood of my enemies! (Which is the best lipstick color EVER.)



2. A Fork

Wandalis Velez writes, "A fork...in case cake happens!"  Not a bad idea!

3. A Brick


Mommy Needs Vodka

She sounds like a feisty, wonderful lady!

4. Corkscrew Wine Bottle Opener

Kate Los has been one of my favorite page fans for years, so naturally she can't go anywhere without a wine bottle opener! What would happen if someone encountered an unopened bottle of wine in the wild? Kate to the rescue!



5. Onion and Legos



Someone else responded that "At least it wasn't the skin of a Lego man with an onion inside." 

6. Gin and Tonic...cleverly disguised!

She wins the day with this one!


7. Fabric Hankie

Cool idea!


8. Shopping Cart Warning

Shannon Stebbins isn't taking any risks going into the restroom with an empty shopping cart left outside. As someone else pointed out, you can never find a store employee when you need one, but an in-use cart disappears in seconds. The solution?  "A homemade card that reads "Do not take this cart. We are in the bathroom. My kids are all grown, but I still use it." Brilliant! 



9. A Feather

So sweet, Jen Mills keeps the first feather she found after her sweet furbaby passed away.


10. Items in case there's a shower

Roxann Therres is prepared. " I have a roll of scotch tape, scissors, a sewing kit and a tape measure. You never know when you need to win a baby shower game." Smart thinking!


11. U.S. Constitution

A pocket sized copy of the Constitution. Handy if you need to know your rights on the spot, or if you're just bored waiting in the doctor's office.


12. Kalua and Anointing Oil

Melinda Salas wrote, "Anointing oil on one side and a travel size bottle of Kahlua on the other side. You know because....Sometimes you feel like an angel sometimes you feel like the devil."  One of my favorite responses!


13. Sentimental Items



14. A Spider in a Vial!

This one is my favorite story....though I personally could NEVER carry this around myself. Originally she put it in her purse as evidence of a spider bite for the doctor. Misty Dawn Hanneken further explains, "The whole story is hilarious. I woke at 5 in the morning and moved my hand over my shirt and felt something underneath. I thought it could be a tangle of hair from newly dried pjs so I grab it and toss it to the side to deal with later. In the dark of the morning, my eyes open wide and I realize the "hair" had legs. It turned into a whole ordeal from there; the jerk bit me three times while trapped under my boob, the bites became infected leading to a secondary infection. I think I have birthed a morbid fascination that lay deep inside me by keeping the jerk in a pill bottle in my purse but he did bite me. What an asshole."

Agreed!  Glad you caught him.


15. Crocheted Sanitary Napkins

I think Melanie Gannon is right that no one else probably has these in their purse! She writes, "A crocheted washable sanitary napkin that I made myself.. I haven't bought maxi pads in years. I treat them just as you would a cloth diaper and they are much healthier and sanitary. I would be delighted to find one other person on the planet that had one of these in their purses."  Great for the environment, but she's a better person than I am!  She has a point - there were no disposables in the olden days.



So there you have it, folks! I love interacting with my Facebook fans, and am so fortunate to have such great people on my pages.

See also: Politically Incorrect Vintage Ads that Would Never Fly Today

3 comments:

  1. Are those button holes on the wing thingys? I never noticed any buttons when I was looking around down there... (Well, the one in the middle was pointed out to me, but I don't see how that works).

    ReplyDelete

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