Mommy Needs Vodka: Mommy Wants Tranquility & SAHM = Bad Mom

Mommy Wants Tranquility & SAHM = Bad Mom


Yowza. How the h ell do SAHMs with babies/toddlers blog?? Do they chloroform their tykes and hop online? Because my little ones let me type one sentence before: “MOMMY! I wants the Leapster and he won’t give me my Buzz! HELP!” Or, “I don’t want this toast, I want fun fruits!” Then after they go to bed, they’re sweet little cherubs, and I end up falling asleep with them. Sighs.

I love them dearly. But I bond better part time. Some study somewhere sometime once said that being a sahm su cks and being a corporate monkey does too—the former being too much around your kids to appreciate them, the latter feeling guilty for not being there enough. I don’t miss having to get permission from my boss for every doctor appointment, trip to the dentist, every sickness, every preschool activity, every time mommy needs to Be There. But there were days—rare though they were—when I would take a day off work and send the kids to daycare and stay home. It wasn’t often, but I COULD take a day off. As a SAHM, there simply is no day off. Never.

I digressed. A little. So, that study. It says work part time, that’s the happy medium for moms. Awesome. Just where oh where is this part time job though? And who does part-time daycare? And WAHM-dom? Yeah, no. Downright hilarious, that.

I can just picture being on the phone with a client and (just as with the PC, it’s this way with the phone) I’d be all, “Yes, that deadline should work,” while wildly motioning with my hand to shoo my son out of the room. “Uh-huh, I can have that to you tomorrow close of business—“ “WAAAAHHHH!! He scratched me!” “—so just get me that data—“ “That’s because he BIT ME FIRST and is hogging the Leapster again!!” “—and I’ll call you when it’s ready.” 

Yyyyeeeeaaahhhh, right.


  1. Move to Europe. Depending on the country there are either many part time jobs, or at least some. More and more employers allow women to work from home for at least some part of the week. There is also part time daycare (and/or qualified nannies that are not devastatingly expensive). I know - easier said than done. Good luck with being a SAHM then. I am also one at the moment, so I know your pain...

  2. After my second son was born (a whopping 13 months after my first son), I went back to work part-time. So I got paid less and I got to feel like twice as much as a failure. I worked every other day. When I was at work, it felt like something happened and I was needed at home. when I was at home, something happened and I was needed at work.
    Luckily (HA), the ex had a gambling problem so I had to return to work full-time to pay the bills. Then I only had the Mom Guilt.


Reading? Write!

Related Posts